Thank you Jennifer Lawrence… Thank you.
oh my fuck.
today has been a good day
The first two make me question my sexuality
I just…. whoa…
dreams have come true
my little cousin got bit by a house spider and she was crying so i went to get some stuff to soothe and numb it but before i could even walk out the door i heard her quietly whisper ‘i can’t handle the responsibility of being spiderman’
|me:||whats your opinion on tampons|
|little brother:||they're little fuzzy sticks on strings|
|me:||then you are ultimately more mature than most boys|
|me:||for some reason tampons are gross and taboo just cuz they go in a vagina|
|little brother:||well so does a penis and boys never stop talking about those|
|me:||that is a fantastic point|
imagine a vampire going “fuck it” and just taking some antihistamines before going to town on a plate of garlic bread
later on it’s wheeled into the ER with like a puffed up face and it just goes “I have been on this earth 10 thousand years but i have not lived until this day”